this is foreign language if you don understand

i wanted to put down so many negative feelings here before i started typing and yet when all those feelings transformed themselves into the form of words, running across my mind like the flashes of lights from across, i did so much screening (because those feelings, when turned into words were nothing building or constructive and i realized that those feelings are not going to bring me far nor would they bring me near the Lord. eventually, this is what i got for the opening.)

as i was saying, no negative stuffs unless they are constructive, and mind me, can a negative thing or an ugly emotion ever be nothing but a tripping stone? i am going home on saturday morning! yes, i am excited and i longed for my sweet serenade!

i wanted to start packing ever since monday and i was actually taking my bag out and laying things down when i realized i had nothing to pack at all. i was appalled to find all my clothes still in the laundry bags and i have yet to wash like so many kilos and the machine broke down. devastating... i started with a few pieces already but the process is so slow and so detrimental to my health... ah, talk about all the standing and scrubbing and soaking and rinsing and squeezing... i have narrowed down, the single thing i hated most about washing clothes manually ............. rinsing!!!! you have to keep on soaking it in pails and pails of water and then to run it under the pipe over and over and over again but the soap never seem to be leaving the clothes! argh.... hate washing!

other than that, life had been swell, wish i can say that. but lately my head is so boggled up and there is just so many things to do and so little time and so little motivation.... so i am stuck in the middle of nowhere and i do hope things will get done before i leave for my break!!!

i have so many things to confess and yet so little dispensers. i wanted to share and talk and to cry out but there really isn't any place quaint and cozy enough for that. so many times i reason with myself, stop running in circles or you are going to suffer. my heart seems to have a heart on its on. weird and yet so so true. true. i wish it is heartless, ah nah, just relenting my emotions.

back to nice stuffs, i wanted to be great! to honour my Lord! ah, let things be and know that God takes charge. amen.

p/s: i have readers from poland!