And so the cycle continues...

i came back to kuching with keen determination to do something, something worthy of my time and holidays. i wanted to:
do revision for various subjects, prepare for my microbiology and organic chemistry test, brush up on intermediate maths of which i'm at borderline, finish my tutorials and assignments and reports.
much to my own disappointment, i'm again, at this stage, tomoro i'm going back to uni d, and i cant cross out anything from my check list. this feeling really sucks.

other things i managed to accomplish that's oso within my checklist:
meet up with friends, but i cant make it in meeting EVERYONE, guess there'll always be next time?

attended my cousin John's wedding yesterday, i'm mesmerized. at the same time, i keep on pondering upon a few things.

how are we supposed to know who is the one when feelings are so undependable and eyes could be deceiving? God, how are You going to show us? what if we make mistakes? or what if we are too scared about making mistakes and eventually cost us to miss that someone?

i guess this is only random worries of a desperateez... well, how can i not be? when everyone's gotten hold on something while i still gaping for breath in the rocky waves... i feel like i m missing out. but i know where this can lead to. one experience is more than enough to ward me off. thinking that you are in love doesn't necessary mean that you really are in love or anything. and we are not talking about the one we love.

feelings change. over time. gradually. what's left after all that? seriously. it couldn't be true, things that the pagans said about love, being like fireworks, beautiful but short lived. i simply won accept that.

still dying to read: are you there God? its me margaret.