Have a little faith in me

My word, it was a real first!

A really real first!

Not a wink of sleep!

Not an hour, not thirty minutes, nothing!

It’s a different story if you intended on not sleeping to do something else, assignments, watching videos, reading etc. etc., that’s by far more acceptable.

I don’t like insomnia at all. Not a tiny puny little bit! And I have two exams in the morning and afternoon! And the afternoon exam is a killer subject, with all so many stuffs to understand and memorize.

Sigh, all’s well and ends well I guess.

Give thanks to the Lord!

I prayed that He guide my test the next day, regardless of the fact that I didn’t manage to sleep.

Don’t fear! Only believe! Mark 5: 36.

How true. Everything went smoothly under God’s guidance. Sigh…

Have a little faith in me. Have a little faith in me~ (wonder where I remembered this from? Was it a song? Nevermind.)

Let's start from here.

greetings, bloggers and fellow non-blogger ppl! i am officially back on track! the internet connection in utm, is, very very disgusting. i can only check my email sometimes, since most of the time it doesn't support facebook and blogger.

what's new? well, austin hills golf resort is a blast! din get to play golf thouh. but still, its great! especially so because we get to spend time with fellow first-years in our fellowship whom we are not half so closed to. its cool~

cant upload my pictures, so please bear with this official pictures from the website.

nothing much lately. its been quite a breeze. not so at home i presume. i got call from home everyday concerning my brother's university application. my my... i can still recall those worn-out and full-of-regrets and if-only-i-studied days...

i m loving this...

let's start from here.

giving up
why should i
have come too far to forget
beautiful
just got lost
somewhere along the way
so much was missing when you went away

let's start from here
lose the past
change our minds
we don't need a finish line
let's take this chance
don't think to deep
all those promises we couldn't seem to keep
I don't care where we go
let's start from here

standing here
face to face
a finger on your lips
don't say a word
don't make a sound
silence around us now
even when you were gone I felt you everywhere

let's start from here
lose the past
change our minds
we don't need a finish line
let's take this chance don't think to deep
all those promises we couldn't seem to keep
I don't care where we go
let's start from here
let's start from here

I've never been the one to open up
but you've always been the voice within
the only one for my cold heart

let's start from here
lose the past
change our minds
we don't need a finish line
let's take this chance
don't think to deep
and all those promises
let's start from here
lose the past
change our minds
we don't need a finish line
let's take this chance don't think to deep
all those promises we couldn't seem to keep
I don't care where we go
let's start from here

Undertakings

its 4 pm. i just finished lab. feeling: neutral. not excited, not tired, not overjoyed. plain. mundane. i don like this kind of life. so going to join aisec next semester.

catering is going to end soon too. kinda dreading to leave catering. haha, only a few know why. its stupid, but i am always, like, so inevitably put myself into that kind of emotion and situation. its just very typical me. i'm sure i'll get over it soon enough.

perspective is a big thing, really. i m still experimenting with the concept. the fact that how diff ppl at diff circumstances react to an identical situation can really amaze u...

holiday's coming...

Short update

i want broadband i want broadband i want broadband~ grrr~~

Behold me

List down five things you would never do. that should be easy, right? then pick three things on your list of trhings you would never do and do them. that should be quite chalengging eh? i find myself in life size challenges everyday. things i know i must do, i should do, i shouldn't do, i must not do. even though its wrong, i m starting to make in-betweens. things i should not tolerate, i push them into this cloudy and murky zone. hoping no one knows. who am i to fool? The Lord is all-knowing?

GOAL!

this is one of my many times attempting to online at the cafeteria here in KRP. i'm not keeping my hopes up in any case due to past disappointments. everyone find the connection here excellent except for me. i never manage to open one single page on the internett that doesn't say or . this is my first time succeeding, even the connection is worst than my dial up in the past, i cant help but feel proud of my old and cranky lappie! U did it!

Girlish

intending to go wild with words today, but i am really tired already, so i guess i ll go subtle.

did a bit of blog-hopping earlier, for fun, nothing else. i like people who blogs, in a way and some, such individualistic(s). you can tell, you know. some are just trying to make it. some made it effortlessly. its amazing, ho people can be so diversed and crazy about themselves and people around them.

i missed my friends. yup, you guys who were with me, from the very beginning, chipped in somewhere in the middle, newly-mets, i missed you guys. but there are times that we really feel that we needed that space, even between the best of friends. it simple necessity. its not that we don like each other, we love each other, everyone, no doubt. but spare that space in our love.

valentine's coming~ and i am not alone this year. we have plenty of plans cooking up. the main dish is fast food from McD hopefully. u can never get too much of fast food. never. mark my words, NEVER. no matter how hazardous it is to our body. single gal pals in UTM, don feel shy to join us!

Somewhere here, somewhere there, somewhere in between

two tests coming up this week. probably one quiz too. lab reports still half way hanging. two biochemistry lab reports underway, with questions i don't understand and at no point would i be able to come up with appropriate answers... and one more test coming up next week. i am not busy. no, not me. i am just slightly occupied. argh... i don't like it. i cant even watch my dramas and books... by the way, did i mention gilmore girls is a really must-watch drama? well, it is. thumbs up. double thumbs up. just swell.

pending on my bookshelves:

1. Once upon a day by Lisa Tucker

the summary:From Lisa Tucker, the critically acclaimed author ofThe Song Reader, comes a wise, humorous, and deeply compassionate novel about the risks and rewards of loving when a single day can change our lives. Nineteen years ago, a famous man disappeared from Los Angeles, taking his two children, Dorothea and Jimmy, to a rocky, desolate corner of New Mexico where he raised them in complete isolation in a utopian "Sanctuary." The children grew up with books and encyclopedias, records and a grand piano, but no television, computer, radio, or even a newspaper. Now Dorothea, at twenty-three, is leaving this place in search of her missing brother -- and venturing into the wide world for the first time. Dorothea's search will turn into an odyssey of discovery, leading to the truth of her family's past and the terrifying day that changed her father forever. But Dorothea's journey will also introduce her to an unusual cast of characters, including a homeless girl from Missouri who becomes a jazz singer and a social worker whose mistake in judgment changes her best friend's life. And she will meet Stephen, a doctor turned cabdriver who, after suffering his own losses, has lost his ability to believe in a meaningful world. Together, they have a chance to make a discovery of a different kind: that though a heart can be broken by the tragic events of a day, a day can also bring a new chance at love and a deeper understanding of life's infinite possibilities. Beautifully written, with a spellbinding story,Once Upon a Dayis "a lyrically poignant reminder of the necessity of hope" (Publishers Weekly, starred review).

2. the maid's request by michele desbordes


(yup i know, solemn potrait)



At the behest of the French king an artist has journeyed from Italy to lead his school of students in the design and construction of a chateau in the Loire Valley. This novel tells the story of an enigmatic relationship between a 16th-century Italian painter and his servant.



in between emotions and expectations and exhilarations. i am climbing the stairs, up and down up and down, because i don't know where the staircase leads to, its too high up to make out the destination. and its simply impossible to make out where i climb up from. its too far off the ground. i cant see the ground. i cant even be sure if its the ground or not. because i am not so sure of gravity anymore. and so i cant tell if i am backwards or in the correct position or if that these stuffs still exist or not.

when someone can accept and appreciate themselves, that's when they start to know that there's a mighty beholder, and that they have nothing but pure joy from the fact of knowing that they belong somewhere good for eternity.

Rory and Logan





Rory and Jess



A quickie

Back to school, and i spent most of my time watching Gilmore Girls on my lappie. installed my sound driver! cost me RM 3...

anyway, Gilmore Girls is the real hit!!! Sorry jing, i ll start with gossip girls right after this one. by the way, logan's really kinda nice, even though i still like jess better.

ciao~

Cooking frenzy

i was taking catering as my first co-q entry this semester, it was somewhat not what i expected, fun in some parts and totally grueling in some other parts...

okay, this cooking thing got me so fired up so i decided to do it back home and let my parents taste what their daughter can cook up.

the menu:

mushroom soup~

chicken chop with black pepper sauce~

the procedure:

much too grueling, i refuse to show the pictures

the end product:



the infamous chicken chop became chicken pieces... the just fall apart... the bone removal part did it i think. its far too hard to rid the bones so i kinda rip the meat offf.....






the mushroom soup. the colour's right. it tastes right. but why does it make ppl puke after the tenth spoon....


the pepper sauce!!! taste like pepper. its spicy. so why is it not black? hmmm....

Safe Zone: Don't Cross The Barrier!

i am safely back home in kuching for more than a week d and tonight's my last night here before i can come back around the end of may. sad... i am going to leave for so long... last time paling lama pun dua bulan je....

new year came and go. just like that. wow. simplicity tells everything and i am glad i din go too far. but the soft drinks are still in big leftover quantity. bear this in mind, just serve your guests with plain water!!! that seems to be the new trend. speaking of which, serve fruits instead of the typical tit-bits!!! that's really cool! thumbs up, mr chin!!!

this ain't me. i am not sure who's writing this but this is definitely not me...

reactivated my facebook account. i am not a narcissist!!! just to keep in touch. gosh, this is not me. calm down!!!!!

i uploaded photos in my photo album.

for new year photos, please refer to jayne's facebook account if possible.

happy chiniese new year!

i love my freinds!!! especially you su chern~ you know we'll miss u buckets!! and weiling, don forget what you promised k? we'll check on you soon enough~

Book Reviews

i am into reading all over again~ which is really cool, i am like rediscovering the hidden secret garden i used to have key to. reading is the key to fortune. its true.

i am currently reading:

1. begginer's Greek by James Collins

2. The wedding by Nicholas Sparks


the latter a much deeper read than the first, but good reads all the same. Beginner's greek has a quite typical plot, guy meets girl, misfortunes, seperation, reunion, challenges and obstacles and eventually a happy ending. i fing the opening rather interesting, very very down-to-earth talking and descriptions and very life-size events. the most intrigue part was that the narrator being the male lead. that's a fresh difference.

the wedding is not serious, but thoughtful. compelling story, losing it, fading off, or persisting on. the narrator again is the male lead. bonus points! the narrator was facing a crisis, he feared that there was no longer love between him and his wife, and that they were only to grow further and further apart, with their children already moving out and life becomes quiet. he tried to salvage the little to what was left of their marriage by consulting his father-in-law, the kind of husband whom his wife anticipated, a husband he could never be. pain and distress and illness and growing old in love. these were the major themes of the story. very thoughtful and challenging and touching at the same time. especially like the part where the narrator's wife quote that swans mate for life and stay dedicated even after the other swan dies.

good reads~ bravo!

sometimes, people just lose it

did you ever find yourself in one of those "i am 100% positive about this one, and hey, i'm the victim here" and then you find that its an entirely different thing all along kind of moments?

what brings us there anyway? overconfidence? self-pity? mundane lifestyle? or simply self-centeredness?

i am facing problems that i myself fail to understand. its suffocating and irritating but i don't know how to deal with it. its like, you know there's this problem here. but you just cant seem to pin-point out the specific matter, and you just won't bring yourself into understanding and resolving. its very stressful.

looking forward to celebrating chinese new year anyway~

on top of my so-worried-priorities:

is the shirt i bought for my brother far too big??? distressed.

Where is the love?

this happened totally out of the blue. so its this day, where i skip training for cell group leader in church and went on this extreme shopping spree across the town. first we drop by city square in JB by bus, then hooked on another bus and went all the way to tebrau Jusco. we left around 10 and reached our destination around 12:30, which was like, totally exhausting. met choong voon and syie luing at jusco. haha, see who else skipped the training???

so when we went back to JB, there was a small crowd there were people shouting. the people were actually on a strike!!! complete with banners and leaders and everything. the crowd was really youngsters who probably feelthey need to speak up? but they were laughing and fooling aroun half-way through, so i m not sure if this is the real thing or not. and, plus plus, typical malaysia stuffs, everyone pulling out their handphones an starting to take pictures. but still, wow, this is really my very first time to witness something half so dramatic! cool, but in a not cool way, u get me?

they were ranting on about wars in palestine which i am not aware of. so i looked it up on google and that opened a whole new perspective of which i never set foot on. it was dawning to me how ignorant i had been all along when everything imaginable and unimaginable were happening out there. i was totally shocked and taken aback by what i got to find out on issues concerning palestine and israel. disturbing, and definitely not taking sides. its far too complicated.














its not only the war in palestine and israel that should let us be sorry bout, all wars that kills children. think about the children!!!! don't you just love them? and don't you feel angry seeing how they were mistreated? but what are we to do? and this is what that is going to happen before the end. its promised. war and famines and disasters, alas, people, how long will you withstand?

instead of wasting your time boycotting and goin on strikes on the road, that most probably wont contribute much to resolving the matter, brace yourself, prepare yourself, be ready, be alert, for the time will come like a thief, creeping up on you. and you won even realise it.


where is the love people?

What's wrong with the world mama?
People living like aint got no mamas
I think the whole worlds addicted to the drama
Only attracted to the things that bring you trauma
Overseas yeah we tryin to stop terrorism
But we still got terrorists here livin
In the USA the big CIA the Bloodz and the Crips and the KKK
But if you only have love for your own race
Then you only leave space to discriminate
And to discriminate only generates hate
And if you hatin you're bound to get irate
Yeah madness is what you demonstrate
And that's exactly how anger works and operates
You gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love y'all

People killing people dying
Children hurtin you hear them crying
Can you practice what you preach
Would you turn the other cheek?
Father Father Father help us
Send some guidance from above
Cause people got me got me questioning
Where is the love?(where is the lovex3)(the love2x)

It just ain't the same all ways have changed
New days are strange is the world the insane?
If love and peace so strong
Why are there pieces of love that don't belong
Nations dropping bombs
Chemical gases filling lungs of little ones
With ongoing suffering
As the youth die young
So ask yourself is the loving really strong?
So I can ask myself really what is going wrong
With this world that we living in
People keep on giving in
Makin wrong decisions
Only visions of them livin and
Not respecting each other
Deny thy brother
The wars' going on but the reasons' undercover
The truth is kept secret
Swept under the rug
If you never know truth
Then you never know love
Where's the love y'all?(I don't know)
Where's the truth y'all?(I don't know)
Where's the love y'all?

People killing people dying
Children hurtin you hear them crying
Can practice what you preach
Would you turn the other cheek?
Father father father help us
Send some guidance from above
Cause people got me got me questioning
Where is the love?(where is the lovex3)(the lovex2)

I feel the weight of the world on my shoulder
As I'm getting older y'all people get colder
Most of us only care about money makin
Selfishness got us followin the wrong direction
Wrong information always shown by the media
Negative images is the main criteria
Infecting their young minds faster than bacteria
Kids wanna act like what the see in the cinema
Whatever happened to the values of humanity
Whatever happened to the fairness and equality
Instead of spreading love, we're spreading anomosity
Lack of understanding, leading us away from unity
That's the reason why sometimes I'm feeling under
That's the reason why sometimes I'm feeling down
It's no wonder why sometimes I'm feeling under
I gotta keep my faith alive, until love is found

People killing people dying
Children hurtin you hear them crying
Can you practice what you preach
Would you turn the other cheek?
Father Father Father help us
Send some guidance from above
Cause people got me got me questioning
Where is the love?(fade)


Randomization

things are finally back on track. i am back in action in church, attending events and socializing, grabbing my book back,eating right, sleeping right, studying, oh yeah. and i am going back to kuching soon, so i guess the getting-used-to-uni-life routine will have to start all over again. dang. not that i dread bout going home. puh-lease, i am 101% into going home and meeting me friends for good.

sigh, i don know what got into me. lessons learnt aren't always lessons remembered. i find that i ocassionally repeating myself, especially its something i shouldn't be doing. i want a life!

catering was a breeze so far. i am really looking forward to doing more cooking!!! we only started on table setting and stuffs.

tebrau jusco is really really magnificent! spring and boulevard is like, my...

finally i have things to look forward to in my life again~

Tagged

Rule 1: People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any questions that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

Rule 2: Tag 5 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse.

These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the same person whom they were tagged by continuing this game by sending it to other people.

Tagged by Ashley Jing and Aurelia Orilia.

1. Do you have secrets?
~Most of the time, but once I let it out, I really let it out.

2. Would you fall in love with a boy younger than you?
~Yup. Definitely. All's fair in love.

3. Do you enjoy going to college?
~Yeah, its cool. I like the variety of people I get to meet on daily basis.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
~ I'll build myself a personal library. Get around places. Build schools. Build churches...

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
~I don't have a guy best friend at the moment and I don't like girls so that makes it a no.

6. What do you prefer? Touching story or happy story?
~That depends, touching stories are sometimes heavy, happy stories are less burdening.

7. List recently watched movies.
~ Wild Child, House Bunny, Harold and Kumar, Twilight, Australia

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
~Hmmm, nothing I guess.

9. List 5 favourite songs: (most recent)
~ Hou lai ~ my all time favourite
One Way
Stop and stare
Ice-cream by Ciara Newell
Bu Chao Bu Yong Hua Qiang~ JJ

10. Do you have any regrets?
~Yes, I used to, but doing things that makes me regret is part of shaping of the me now. so, go with the regrets!

11. What are your favourite emoticons used recently?
~ I seriously don't like emoticons.

12. What are your favourite saying recently?
~ Do I have one?

13. What kind of person do you think the person that tagged you is?
~ She's both mature and a child at heart in various matters, she is artsy and beautiful, elegant and optimistic, happy and outgoing, delightful and smart. She's the it-girl~

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
~ Ooops... I shouldn't have problem choosing, but I do...

15. What is your favourite colour?
~Every colour appeals differently under different situations. If I had to pick, its white.

16. Would you give all in a relationship?
~ I have my limits.

17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, whih one would you choose?
~ The third one?

18. What are the top 5 places on your tp-go list?
~ London
Paris
Amsterdam
New York
and anywhere where I can eat apples growing on trees

19. Name three thing you would like to do but never able to
~Being patient
Getting married by 18
Dance on a serious stage

20. 5 people i wanna tag
~Jayne
Yen Pin
Sze Inn
Chin Lin
Chia Yin

New Year 2009


new year 2009, memorable and regretful and full of mischief. i want to upload plenty of photos but i cant, i don't trust the computers here in the school library...

31st of december was my coursemate zinc's birthday, so we kinda celebrate it together with new year. our senior lucas brought us and piaw in one car while lilian drove the rest in a rented car all the way to tebrau to catch a movie together. we intended to watch bedtime stories by Adam Sandler.........

.....

ended up watching Australia instead... which was really pretty impressive and everything, but we watched half-heartedly, due to a few reasonss...

  1. we are sitting too far out at the front (its hard to take in the whole picture)
  2. we are not watching wat we wanted
  3. it was a pretty long move, with our twelve midnight curfew on the other bend...
credits to australia though, like i said it was really pretty impressive

  1. the gallopping of horses and cows, real magnificent
  2. the romance epic, i simply love nicole kidman, awesome
  3. the storyline, though it gets boring, since its such a happy ending
  4. the singing of aboriginal people in australia, amazing
we had our new year celebration inside the car, stuck in traffic, watching fireworks display through the car window.

in the end, we were late due to the heavy traffic. we got our matrics card scanned, bad thing. wat a way to countdown for new year.

sneak peek

this is a brief one. been back for some time already. glad that i would be going back home very soon, on the 22nd! cant wait for new year to come and everything. but really dreaded on the part that i have to stay here for approx. 5 months before going home again sometime in early june or late may.

finally feeling like a university student. i had been out shopping far more than what i had been doing the whole semester in my first semester. but it also implies that i am spending much much more money than i should have been. but my purchases are still mainly on food and entertainment, so maybe i should seriously consider cutting all that expenses.

plus plus plus, one of our lecturers this semester, namely Mr. HBB, he's like a real adore, he made classes enjoyable anf far more lineant in many aspects of our grades. that kind of made it easy for us to score and so its like, oooh, so this is uni life.

till next time, ciao~

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