Starring me, as myself

criticisms make me think. am i really on the right path? they say i'm not suitable to teach, because of my short temper, and weird theories, and my tendency to "lead by fear" instead of "lead by influence". well, to me, its the same thing. fear is another type of influence, sometimes it works faster, so its actually a more effective influence. therefore, a more suitable way to teach, since in teaching, which involves so many students, fear works better, cz it works on a larger scale, while influence, its like, on a much smaller crowd, some are influenced, some think i m crapping. so i m on the right path. i think.

what i really really think i know, the very minute i stepped in front of the class giving the introductory speech ( my voice cracked slightly and was shaking quite bad, but that's not the point), i felt like I"M DOING IT! as in, man, i'm this person, the person who's talking now, its SOOOOOO ME~ and i'm so liking it, because i'm no longer pretending to be someone else. the students dont know me, so i'm a fresh sheet, i can be anything, and most importantly i can be myself, and they don have to hate me for it, well they can, but i'm stil in authority, so they cant touch me~ it feels great!

i'm shouting, scolding, reasoning, giving MY opinions, saying my thoughts, making things happen all at my own liking, and i have the authority, i have the say, i'm like invincible! haha, that was great! finally, i'm not on the listening end ( nothing wrong about being the listening end, don get me wrong, its always nice for an identity switch, and i bet lots think so, otherwise there wont be movies like freaky friday etc). i m doing all the talking, n one can easily get addicted, making ppl listen, even when they don wan to, making them too enjoy listening, when they really don wan, that one, is really tricky, stil in the middle of coping with it.

the best part is, i m always in the place to help. i mean, lots of ppl need help, but they won ask for our help. seriously. either because they feel inferior. or they don wan to bother us. or they think its not okay to tell ppl their problems... etc...etc... being a teacher, students are practically WAITING to be cared for and concerned. every corner u turn, every step u heave, there's a student, who desperately need help, even the most unexpected ones, those bright n disciplined n prim n proper ones, sometimes they have the darkest secrets. not that i m being nosy or anything, just that i see all these opportunities, and i can do so much to them by just talking to them. its... amazing almost.

all this, just to announce that, i like teaching. and maybe u ll find me next time, a librarian. or a fisherman, or a tailor, a fire woman... another point i'm stressing, dreams are called so cz they are not easy to fulfill. a shooting star, that's what it is.